Just a Texas girl with big things on her mind

Nostalgia

2011-11-15T15:03:00.000-06:00

As I am sitting here on my bedroom floor, packing boxes to move back to Kansas City, a big title wave of nostalgia hit me. It wasn't just a wave from one place in my life, it was from like 20 different places. I just wanted to write about a couple of them, just to get my thoughts out, maybe organized.

One feeling was about NYC and how in the last year it's shaped me, my marriage and so many things about my life. It's been quite the ride. The first year of marriage was HARD. I don't think anything that anyone could have said could have prepared me for it lol. Now that we are learning how to settle into it and having a baby and I am looking back on my year here in NYC I see a lot of growth to be appreciative of that I wouldn't have had probably any where else. I am thankful for it and hope that I don't look back. I don't want to be the same or digress. I hope I continue to grow and become strong. I also hope that I can use what I learned to help others, I NEVER want someone to know or have to deal too long with the feeling of loneliness I had so deep within me. I also want people to learn from example the lesson of how when we walk down the street in such a big city you don't have a choice but to rub shoulders with the rich and famous, the poor and homeless, criminals and most likely angels. People in smaller towns don't get to do that and I think we all should. I am going to make a point to serve more when I get back. In places you might not be caught dead in but I'll be there. I may not succeed in all capacities but I am going to try. It isn't contagious, it's precious because I learned a LONG time ago courtesy of Tim and Trish Sanders and Life Church in Houston that when you love the people that no one wants to love, God places the people that everyone loves in your life.

Another wave was about God. I am packing to Hillsong's song This is Our God. Powerful song. As I was listening to it I thought about when I was little and what was preached to me as a little girl. I am amazed where God as brought me from. He's freed me from man and his opinion and ruling. He's brought me to a place where I am learning to trust in him and what the meaning of leaning on him is. "It isn't God I need you NOW, I'm in trouble again I need you to get me out of this." It's this prevailing feeling that he is with you at all times, not just when you need him. It's that he is sweet enough to love you, even when you don't love yourself. I know a lot of people, maybe even people who I am closest to may not believe in him; but when you feel him he is undeniable. I don't even mind if you do or if you don't. I care yes about your soul but you are the one missing out. This is our God, this is who he is. As I was walking down the street today I heard a loud siren type of noise that sounded almost musical. For the first time in my life I wondered what song Gabriel will choose to play at the sound of the trumpet. I understood WHY it would and could be a precious sound. I get a little indignant when I think of how people can be. Don't EVER tell me my God isn't the same as yours, unless you worship the devil. He is RULER of ALL. That's our God, that's who he is. We share something so powerful and even if I don't like you as a person, we can worship under the same roof because he is OUR God. He is just and even when people don't see right or wrong, he DOES. I am so vulnerable to wrong doing but he, he is PERFECT. I can only hope that my life is one that he loves and start to make changes in my life shaped by his heart and direction.

Sometimes I think I blog because when I go back and read what I wrote I am reminded of how I felt and it puts me in check. I can't wait to see the people I love and move home.

See you SOON!

Lunch time blog!

2011-08-19T12:16:00.000-05:00

I walk through the streets with million and 12 thoughts. When I sit down to blog they all run away and hide! I think I will start bringing my laptop to work and blogging at lunch.

So my thoughts lately are on this: all people really want is just not to be alone. Whether it’s your freak flag you are flying or something you need some one else to "get you" on, you just want to know that you are not the only one flying one or that someone else has one too.

I feel like I need to start a section of my blog titled: "What's nuts about this city today..." haha! I see some CRAZY things. This morning I saw a girl about 15 years old maybe getting out of a cab in front of a building that had a doorman. She had this confusing look on her face like she never opened a cab door for herself before. SERIOUSLY?????? This IS on Park Avenue but STILL!!!!!!!!! I wanted to shake the poor thing. When the doorman, who couldn't really see her, realized she was there he was falling all over himself apologizing for not opening the door. I wanted to shoot him for himself. That can not be a full filling career.....??

So my Mommo comes to see me in 14 days, 8 hours and 47 mins. I am a wee bit excited if you couldn't tell!!!!!!!!!! Agh!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am in Starbucks blogging and this really adorable special needs guy just came in and went up to the register. The girl up there was so nice to him it made my heart smile. GO Starbucks barista! ;) It reminded me of how Jonathon deemed my mom the special needs minister and service patrol of TLC and I giggled. Ugh. I miss my Boo Boo.

Well, it took me a little while to find this Starbucks so now I have to get back to work but I will do more lunch time blogs!

All my love,
Iz

Frustrations.

2011-05-13T22:37:00.000-05:00

Ugh. I hate this city right now. I hate that “shot shot, shot shot shot” is unmelodiously (I might have made that word up) playing outside with base shaking my windows. A bunch of drunk people with no awareness that people LIVE here screaming sluridly (yes, I did just make that word up) WOOOOO HOOOOOO just because they can. Yes, I am aware this makes me sound like the fun natzi and I am really not. I am just tired of this CONSTANT noise. I don’t know how people thrive off CONTINUOUS insanity and chaos. I have to have my quiet at times and where I usually have it is my home. A place I can go to and just breathe. I am not saying I want complete silence. I wouldn’t mind an occasional honking horn, siren or bass playing a little too loud but we are talking an around the clock, cease less noise of the following: ruckus, music blaring, screaming, yelling, people fighting, drunk people cussing each other out, a GIANT bus running it’s engine, motor cycles, not just honking but when one car honks at LEAST 4 follow in suite, or someone just LAYING on their horn. Imagine if this were all in your drive way. Either that or let’s just say that EVERY Friday night you had a incessant line of traffic outside your house with each car blaring their music and EVERY car had different music playing, not all even in the same language (not that it even matters at this point.) You can’t sleep with your windows open because there would be no sleep.

Maybe it’s friday night and I am just being too old fashioned or my age has caught up with me and I am just old and need to be taken to the funny farm. More than anything I am just downloading.

Believe it or not I DO like living here. I guess it’s just days like this when someone close to you in your life has a bad day then it makes your day bad too. It’s nice having someone to share things with but I guess this is when you realize that your mood strongly and directly effects others in an immediate facet.

Ahhhh. I already feel better.

Your name just might be in this ;)

2011-02-11T19:10:00.005-06:00

I am.....bay far.......the MOST sentimental person I know. I wish I weren't sometimes but other times I face the truth of it. I am, by far, the most sentimental person I know. I wish I remembered HALF of the things I walk around thinking about and it crosses my mind "I should blog that!" and when I sit down to blog I think "what was I thinking about again?"

I just watched an episode of Grey's Anatomy (I can see some of the smirking now) and my heart is so full. It's not because of the show, we all know the drama and some of us just waller' in it haha. It was the Christmas episode from season 6 and it was SO heartfelt. It made me laugh and feel the feelings that only Christmas can bring. It's almost unexplainable but let me try a little. It's this feeling of hope that makes your heart rise to the top of your chest cavity. It swells with the sweetest, most pure love that a human can offer. To see it would be to look at the most tremendous sparkle, so blindingly bright but you can't take your eyes off the beauty of it. The most vivid of colors that make your eyes thankful for sight. A gratefulness for the simple things. *sigh* It makes you want to give what you have to offer, the best of yourself. Being a medical show it reminds me of why I want to further my career, to give the best that I can to people. To bring healing in various forms, what a gift.

We walked to Central Park today, Molly LOVED it. She almost pulled me into the lake chasing the ducks. We watched people ice skate. This little boy, about 1 year old with the sweetest little cheeks, brown eyes and a ring around his mouth of hot chocolate fell in LOVE with Molly and they played. It was peaceful. I see why people love Central Park so much. It's a break. It made me think and ask myself who are you when people aren't watching? I wondered as people passed are you still little Ms. Tough, hide your heart because it's been so hurt? Are you Mr. Macho because of the pain of losing something or trying to keep up? The summation of my thought was sometimes, you have to lose till you win and start it all over again. Sometimes, you just have to believe it will be alright again. I had a friend tell me one time years ago "When you hear faith is blind, it's true. Sometimes you have to have faith, even when you can't see it." it's REALLY stuck with me. I didn't say these thoughts were organized, I just offered to share them haha. They somehow have an arch of relevance in my mind. ;)

Everyone knows my relationship with church has changed. I haven't been ready to talk about it till now. I still don't know exactly what to say but I will say this: I believe in the doctrine I have been raised with. I strongly agree with the salvation. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God is returning. I am reading The Case For A Creator. I am praying for some clarification for some things. Heaven help us all. ;)

I look at my husband who is sitting across the room as I type this, playing the piano. He's talented and brilliant and did I mention hot? *wink* I lit this cherries jubilee candle that my precious mother-in-law sent us for Valentines day and my dog who is the sweetest thing in existence is laying on the couch full from a snack I made her and my heart is beyond brimming with love and hope and feelings of goodness.

I miss Jonathon right now. *sigh* I can talk to him about something as deep as the meaning of life or laugh about an inside joke. I miss Becca, aka Houston. Just the thought of her makes me smile. I miss Pyle. Her advice and our chats. I of course miss my family. I miss Patsy's hugs and kisses and most of all hearing her pray. I miss riding with Syd and talking about horse bidness'. I miss the smell of grass, and seeing it, even if it's yellow. I miss seeing stars, I hope they still exist lol. I miss Shirley and her wealth of knowledge and her patience to teach and ability to talk to anyone who will listen. I miss MC's sweet smile and voice. I miss Starla, for too many reasons, that's a whole blog in and of it's self. I miss Kim, the person that can relate to ANYTHING I say because she's an amazing friend like that. I miss Drea who offers the most unconditional love of anyone I know. I miss Jess, her heart of gold and humor that can knock my breath away and her loyalty. I miss the Sanders and laughing with them and playing with Owen and DJ. These are just a few things that I miss at the moment. :)

I think my occipital protuberance is crooked today lol. I know that my nose is crooked everyday but maybe that's what's wrong with me, either that or maybe it's a full moon. Which makes me think of Rainey. Miss sharing with you girl. :) Do the full moon dance for me. ;)

Till next time........

Love,

This was from 1/26/11 at 11:30am ish

2011-01-27T15:20:00.001-06:00

"I just saw a man riding a uni cyle in Times Square"

I'm trying something new; blogging on the subway. Before I came down the title of this blog is true. I also saw a "woman" that I'm pretty sure was a man dressed as a woman in these HUGE blue surgical shoes. It's snowing today. We are supposed to get like 5 inches. I also saw a man biting his scarf. Does that make you less cold? Welcome to Times Square.

I am on my way to an appointment to get my hip taken care of. I've been in some pain with it so hopefully this will clear some of that up.

Here's my NYC thought or lesson for this morning: put your chap stick on BEFORE you leave the house.

That's it for now!

NYC and other thoughts. It's a long one folks......

2011-01-24T14:59:00.003-06:00

I love my name. My last name was just changed. I am still getting used to it because it’s only been 3 months.

I love God, although my relationship with him has changed. I don’t really know why I am writing this. I suppose it’s to get a look at myself.

I love music, all kinds. I love Gospel, Hip hop, R&B, Jazz, even classical. I hate heavy metal or music that has bad lyric’s or ones I can’t understand because they are screaming them, stripping their voice.

I am too sensitive but that also allows me to see and sense things that most people can’t. I wonder if that’s appreciated by anyone or if it’s just an annoyance to everyone, including me.

I love mango ice tea and am sad they don’t sell it at sonic anymore. I miss sonic. I hate when people call it Sonics. I also hate when people call Wal-mart, Wal-marts or say mines instead of mine. Only one person has ever gotten away with it and that’s Jodi. I think that’s only because I used to tease her so much about it and she would laugh and that would make me laugh. I miss Wal-mart and Sonic.

It’s an odd feeling knowing that you don’t just get into your car, drive down the road, get to where you want to go, get what you want, load it up and drive home. I miss my car.

I almost look at the people here in a car with this bitterness because they are in this warm, safe environment that they can listen to their music out loud, they are out of the elements. They control the temperature lol. It’s a childish thing but I am sure I will get over it.

There really is no feeling like walking. There is also a relief in not having a car payment and insurance. I guess I am just feeling both ends of the spectrum.

I almost don’t like the feeling of realizing something so strongly. You know, when you realize WHY you feel the way you do about something. The other day I was out with a friend and I realized why I felt the way I did about some things. I was filled with regret, sadness, disappointment, anger and hurt. You don’t want it to be true, you wished you never realized it. Then, it slowly comes into focus why you are realizing this. I don’t know the point yet, but I am working on it. That might be a different blog.

I hate being misunderstood. If you know me very well you know I will talk until I almost or actually succeed at driving you nuts till you understand what I am saying. It’s annoying I know but how do you get people to understand you unless you do it till you feel like they understand?

I had my groceries delivered this morning. That was an odd feeling. It’s almost a relief because it’s only 10 degrees outside and even though I feel guilty for not going to get them, thinking about having to haul them home in 10 degree weather just makes me weighed down and distraught lol.

The sink in our kitchen drips ALL the time, a constant drip. It’s annoying. Bo says it’s like Chinese water torture and even though I am not sure what exactly that entails I agree.

People are nice here. New Yorkers are not mean, just a different breed and they all understandeach other. I read this blog and this is the TRUEST article I have read in my 3 weeks of living here.

NYC has the most extreme benefits to it, but it also requires the most extreme concessions in order to get those benefits. This makes sense. It’s how most of life is. So in order to understand how good a fit you’d be in NYC, you don’t need to look at the benefits – we all want the benefits of NYC. What you need to look at is what you give up.

Here are three questions to ask yourself. You need to answer yes to at least two in order to be a good fit in NYC.

1. Are you a maximizer?

Optimizers are people who are always looking for the best of everything. You know if you are this kind of person because you are never complacent. You are always trying to find if there is something better. It could be a someone who cuts bangs better, a better pickup basketball game, you keep trading up boyfriends, maximizers are always looking for something better, and they usually get greatness in their lives in many aspects. Non-maximizers can be satisfied with what they have. Each of us falls somewhere on this spectrum. New Yorkers skew heavily to strong maximizers.

This is because you can find pretty much the best of everything in NYC. (Yes, maybe there are some things, like the best ski slope, that you cannot find there, but if that’s what you want most, you probably shouldn’t be in NYC.)

I know you have heard that NYC is expensive. But you will never really know how insanely expensive it is until you live there. It’s like having children. Everyone will tell you having kids is really, really hard. Harder than anything they’ve ever done. And everyone will also say that after all those warnings, they still were not prepared for how hard it was when the baby came. This is what money is like in NYC – you absolutely cannot imagine how expensive it is there until you are there, living day to day.

So New Yorkers constantly have to ask themselves: What am I paying so much for? What am I suffering so much for? Life in NYC is very hard, and if you go to any city in the US, there is a bond that ex-New Yorkers have because they know they each understand how hard life was.

I say this to tell you that the only way to justify the cost and hardship of NYC is because you’re an optimizer. You appreciate having access to the best of things. Not everything – you probably have a few things that are really important to you. And you’re willing to trade off a lot of comforts to get it.

2. Do you want to be at the top of your field (or marry someone like that)?

In many cases, people have to work in NYC in order to rise to the top in their field. (Or, they want to marry someone like this – NYC is a very competitive place to find a husband but only because women recognize that the pickings are superior: Maximizing knows no bounds.)

Wanting to be at the top of your field is not for everyone. Business Week reports that eighty percent of generation Y thinks they are in the top ten percent of all workers. So a bunch of you are overestimating your capabilities, right? But the truth is that NYC is very, very competitive, because it's a magnet for ambitious, strong performers, and if you are not in the top, you will probably not do very well there. So if you do not go to NYC thinking you will work your way to the top of your field, you probably don’t need to be going there for your work.

And, of course, you do not necessarily have to live in NYC to work in NYC, but in order to get a substantially lower cost of living, you would have to move pretty far from the city. This is why New York has the longest commute times of anywhere in the country. This is a fine line to walk, though, because long commutes do a lot of damage to one’s ability to be happy. So you are probably better off paying to high price to live closer to work if you want to get to the top of your field.

3. Do you value an interesting life over happy life?

New Yorkers are not known for being happy. In fact, they are known for being unhappy, and they don’t care.

On balance, New Yorkers understand that most people who are happy are complacent – they like the status quo. And people who like what they have do not do innovative things to change the world. They like the world just fine how it is. This is probably why 95% of New Yorkers voted democrat in the last presidential election. Republicans are typically happier with their lives than democrats. And most New Yorkers are maximizers, and maximizers are almost never happy.

New Yorkers think an interesting life is more important than a happy life. What you really pay for with the exorbitant cost of living and the hard lifestyle is to be surrounded by strong performers, huge ambitions, and constant need for change and innovation. To live in New York City, you have to trade happiness for this. To most New Yorkers, it’s a no-brainer. They would take that trade any day. To most people outside of New York City the trade-off is crazy.

I don’t know if I will ever be a New Yorker but I will tell you that I am enjoying being me today. I will be honest, there are some days I don’t make it outside. There have even been a couple days where I haven’t made it out of bed really. The good news is it has gotten better. There are some great things that have happened since I’ve been here and I’ve had some great days. I am more thankful for them than I could put into words.

There is some GREAT shopping here. I have found a couple REALLY cute skirts for $9.99 and some tights that just rawk for $8.00 and they were buy one, get one ½ off. NIIIIICEEEE!!!!!

I just heard and felt a rumble. That’s another thing about living in NYC most of the time I have NO idea what’s going on. What kind of “thing” makes a rumble like that? An earthquake? God help me lol. The sirens here are what’s deafening, and FREQUENT. I think we live really close to a hospital because there are sirens every few mins.

A couple nights ago, on Saturday Bo and I had just walked Molly and we were standing on the corner just making sure she didn’t have to go anymore. All of a sudden I hear this screeching of brakes and I tell myself I am not going to look. The traffic here makes me crazier and more terrified than anything. But what do I do? Yeah, I look. As I look I see this Volvo and Hummer crash, then the Volvo crashes into a parked car, that rear ends the car in front of it and the hummer drives UP ONTO the side walk and stops a HAIR away from the chipotle window. I thought for sure it was going through the chipotle. I went to see if they were ok and the Volvo is SUCH a safe car. The girl was trapped, the driver’s side door was smashed in and she had to climb out her passenger side and she did not have even a HINT of a scratch on her. The air bags were AMAZING. They had no residue and were solid but left no burn. The side and front air bag deployed. I really admire that car!

Whew, this has been an exceedingly miscellanies and long blog but I guess I just felt the need to get this all off my chest. So, if you read the whole thing or even just a couple sentences, thanks! ;)

Much love,

Get it here, get it now!!

2011-01-14T11:51:00.005-06:00

This is what the man said standing on the corner selling hat's, scarves, and gloves. They have this commercial on TV here that says something like: "Why do you cross the street before the cross walk blinks walk? Why do you ____ and why do you ____? (I've only seen the commercial once) Then it says: "Because your a real New Yorker"

Well my friends I am not a "real New Yorker" yet. I say that because it took me forever to become a Texan and I swore I would never be one, alas I am and I am proud of it. :)

I know this is a really shocking story but I was so blown away by it that I just want to share it.

This was just a couple blocks away from my house: www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2011/01/07/2011-01-07_times_square_murder_man_found_dead_in_bloodsplattered_room_at_intercontinental_h.html

This was just posted Monday about it: www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2011/01/10/2011-01-10_tourists_model.html?obref=obnetwork

How INSANE is that?!?!?!? Bo and I were watching soccer and this guy came in talking about how he was interviewed about it and I looked it up. The hotel is really nice, it's supposedly very new and the security on it is uber tight. I walk by it to get to the subway all the time.

Anyways, I don't feel unsafe or anything but was just blown away by that.

Bo is taking me to the Metropolitian Museam of Modern art soon and even though I am not a fan of modern art I am very excited about the expierence.

I had my first visitor to the city this week. Jonathon came to see me. It was heavenly and I loved every second of it. I will post pics on FB today. We went to Central Park and to eat at my favorite pizza place and walking around Time's Square. *sigh*

The food here is awesome. Bo has taken me to some really really great places. Speaking of Bo, I am SO proud of him! He's all enrolled in his semester and ready to go! I think classes start Jan 28th for him. GO BABY!!!!!

Molly is doing good. I am fearful of the snow melting because she won't go to the bathroom anywhere else. I had to buy her shoes because the salt hurt her paws, I will post pics n vids of that on FB because it's HYSTERICAL. So now I will need 3 jobs to keep her in shoes lol. She is my joy here. She LOVES that there are SO many people here and she gets to sniff them all. It's like a smorgas board for her lol. Her favorite thing to do is lay on our bed and look out the window, she will bark and wag her tail at all the people and other dogs every once in awhile. She's SO cute. :)

Believe it or not I have been super busy unpacking and running around and having homesick breakdowns. It's nice to have some "normal" days though.

Well, I am going to post somethings on FB, so talk to you soon!

XOXO

First post from NYC

2011-01-12T21:22:00.002-06:00

How appropriately titled! This would indeed be my first post from NYC. *sigh*

I have been trying to keep everyone posted about what's going on and the progress of things on FB. I've posted pics and vids n' such.

I am also posting from a mac. It's odd because it knows where I am. I looked at my "dashboard" and it knows where I am! The weather, the time, but the crazy thing is I never put my location in! I think my computer is alive, psycho or stalking me!! haha I hardly know anything about a mac so this too is a journey that's not easy for me. Bo probably put it in and I am just tripping lol.

I keep thinking that I have to get on and pour out everything all at once and so I don't get on at all. If I can just post things here and there I could probably get some where! I keep a great blog in my head. In fact sometimes, I think in a blog like structure lol.

I get tired easily here it seems. I hadn't been out of the house all day, I worked from home for a while and then went to dinner with my hubby. I had a GREAT cheese burger. I should have taken a pic of it. Then we walked to meet a friend if his at a place he was working, chatted for a little bit and then came home. The thing is that you walk EVERYWHERE. We've been to BB&B twice now and it's like 20 blocks each way. It feels AMAZING to walk but its SOOOO cold! I think my butt cheeks were frozen together for like 4 hours after coming inside yesterday! I know that's not something you want to think about but that's just the reality of it folks. It's 25 degrees outside right now. I know it's only 9 in KC but the wind here just beats you to death.

I'm so cold right now. My fingers are pulling not to type. I need to take Molly outside but everything is just like nooooooooooo. (except Molly)

I wanted to post some pics tonight but I don't have the energy, I will get back on tomorrow and post some more and some pics.

This is my start!

XOXO

Bo's Isabelle

Heartfelt thoughts:

2009-10-02T12:15:00.000-05:00

I felt like blogging today so here are my heart thoughts:

My pastor touched my life today and doesn’t even know it. I read his twitter and it said: “The road to perfection is always under construction”

WOW. How true. I think perfection is seeing flaws and loving them, and that my friend will ALWAYS be a constant lesson.

I was looking at Krista’s blog, and I heard this man with no arms and legs say if I fall it should be IMPOSSIBLE for me to get back up, but it’s now. If I try 100 times and fail, and I give up, will I ever get back up? No. But if I fail I try again, and again and again, but it’s not the end. I find the strength to get back up. And guess what……..he worked it till he got up! No arms, no legs. He put his head down and pushed.

How uncanny is that? Sometimes you have to be down to get back up, put our heads down, to get back up. I have thought a lot in the last week and a half or so of the words “reflection” and “restoration.”

Reflection: I am NOT by any means a person that claims to understand physics but, I like things that get my attention haha and when I read about reflection this is what I learned: The law of reflection simply states that the angle of reflection always equals the angle of incidence. Basically it’s the return of light, heat, sound, etc., after striking a surface. What is bounced of us metaphorically that is returned? The quote “Be the change you want to see in the world” applies here. Let me work within myself to see the things I want to come back, the things I want to “reflect.”

Restoration: Life is a battlefield sometimes and through the battle, it’s true, you get wounds, and some leave scars. Some heal and fade and you would never know they were there or even happened. Restoration means a return of something to a former, original, normal, or unimpaired condition. But what if……what if it will never be “the same” I think then the meaning is a renewal or a revival, to be what it was in a sense but meant to be changed.

It’s your life, what you going to do? The world is watching you. Every day, the choices you make, say what you are and who your heart beats for, it’s an open door. It’s YOUR life!

Are you who you always said you would be?

I want to be. God help me to be!

As always: make my brokenness beautiful.

Love,
Izzi

Just a few thoughts:

2009-06-22T11:22:00.001-05:00

I’m different. I know this, but it’s only sometimes that I feel badly for it. I march to the beat of a different drum. Chances are that when I look at something, I will see if differently than anyone else. I am loyal, sensitive, and passionate. I love people for who they are, not who’ve they’ve been or who they will be. I’m not afraid of a lot in life but I will run for my life when I see a bee, wasp, or june bug within 30 feet of me. If you are in my life, I will give you unconditional love but a huge fault of mine is accepting it, but I cherish it more than anything.

I love the feeling of Christmas time. I don’t know if it’s because people are more conscious of giving and I think our world needs more of it or if it’s the warm feeling of spending time with people you love, or if it’s that people seem to be a tad more conscious that it’s the basic things in life that make us happy.

A couple days ago I’m sitting at my desk, minding my own business and all of a sudden, out of thin air I hear: hello? It was faint so I thought I was hearing things but then a couple seconds later I hear a little louder hello??? So I respond: hello?? Here I am thinking someone from thin air is talking to me, HELLO I said YES???? Just when I was about to hit my knees because I thought it was a heavenly voice, she said this is Susan with medo pharmacy………Michelle had walked away from a call she put on hold and it was on speaker. I could have choked her, but I still love Birdie. : )

I was listening to a sermon this morning and lately I’ve been thinking about how much better life would be if we applied spiritual things to loving the people in life. We know this already but it really hit me personally this morning.

“Anything worth having is worth investing in. If you don’t invest in it you’re implying it’s not worth having.” This is true with people, jobs, animals, anything really. If you want it and it’s worth it……invest in it. The things that cost the most but are priceless are time, effort and true, unconditional love.

My daily devotion this morning was on change and I want to share it:

Subject to change...

The perfect job with an ideal package comes your way. You are ecstatic and delighted. The ideal mate, who loves you more than you could imagine, becomes your spouse. You are thrilled and feel complete. A luxurious home in the most perfect neighborhood becomes yours. You are happy and glad. It is all good, but subject to change.

The beautiful car that you have been eye-balling is approved for you. You are delighted and excited. Your children are doing well and the bills are paid. Now you are pleased and at ease. You are honored for your hard work and given a promotion on your job, and now you are content and comfortable. It is all good, but subject to change.

So what happens when…?You lose your perfect job, and your ideal spouse leaves you broke and penniless. You lose the perfect home and all the contents. Your beautiful car breaks down and you cannot fix it. Your well-behaved children are gone, and they think you’re a disappointment. What happens now?

No one is looking up at you, only down at you. No one is thinking highly of you, only criticizing you. No one is encouraging you, only trying to discourage you. You don’t know where you will sleep tonight, and you don’t know what you will eat tomorrow. Your past seems so far behind; it’s as though it were a dream and not real. Your present seems so useless and uneventful as though there were no hope. Your future seems bleak, because you cannot see or think past the moment in which you are now living.So what happens now?

Now you look for that which is not subject to change…..“For I am the Lord, I do not change…” Malachi 3:6 “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8
Now you put your trust in God; your focus on Christ; your mind on the Lord and your belief in the Word. Now you stand on God’s Word and you walk in His principles. Now you find that what you had was temporal, but what you have now is eternal. If you want real joy and real peace; if you want real success and a real future then grab hold of the Truth.

Now this is joy…Real joy has nothing to do with your outward circumstances, but has everything to do with your inward condition and position in Christ.
Stop putting your trust in those things which are subject to change. Now put your trust in the One who never changes, but is able to change everyone and everything!

“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” James 1:2-4 NKJV

So I guess I say all that to say this: I am going to try to live my life to love as you’ve never seen, even if that comes at the cost of hurt, and a broken heart, at least those scars left will be a symbol that I gave it my all. Live life for what you have right now, for the “good things” in life, what you cherish the most. Make decisions on how it will affect the people you love the most, and I think we will all make better choices.

Love you all. : )

Izzi-Beth : )

2009-04-27T14:20:00.006-05:00

I feel like I have a million thoughts to blog. I never know who really reads this....maybe no one, maybe everyone but I will dive right in:

One miscellaneous thought I have today: Before sex and the city there was Golden girls. I STILL love this show. I catch it on re-runs everytime I can. Estelle Getty, the spicy mouth momma is gone too. :( This only leaves two girls still kickin; Rue McClanahan and Betty White. :(

Another thought, this one OUT RAGES me: the craigslist killer. OMG how DARE he have the "guts" to plead not guilty first of all. SECOND of all what the HECK kind of "reason" is it to kill someone because you "want to know what it feels like?!?!?" Heffers, let me tell you something, I would have done been in prison several times if I acted on that principle. LORD HAVE MERCY!!! And why does he remind me of Jeffrey Dahmer??? *shudders*

More later......lunch is ova rova! ;)

Izzi

Not just for beatuty......

2009-02-19T16:11:00.000-06:00

Girls, weaves are not just for beauty…protect yourself!! haha

February 19, 2009

KANSAS CITY, MO - Other than having a bit of a headache, a Kansas City woman is uninjured after a bullet fired at her ended up tangled in her hair weave.Police said the 20-year-old woman was in a convenience store parking lot late Wednesday when a man flagged her down and told her that her ex-boyfriend still loved her. She replied, "Well I don't love him," then heard gunshots.She said she looked behind the vehicle and saw her ex-boyfriend firing a handgun at her. She stomped her accelerator and fled, then turned into another parking lot and called police. She told officers she recently had ended an eight-month relationship with the suspect.Police arrested the ex-boyfriend and his friend in a car.

Quote of the day.....

2009-02-18T15:45:00.001-06:00

This rings so true. I will write more later.....

“If you don’t risk anything you risk even more.” - Erica Jong

Love,
Iz

Thought for the day....

2009-02-17T14:32:00.000-06:00

I needed this today. Thank you for being in my life, I just wanted to share this. After opening up, people have started opening up to me and I realized that there are SO many people going through things right now. I am so full of thoughts for my friends and family. I love you so much, you make my life complete because you are what I live for.

“Be life long or short, its completeness depends on what it is lived for.” - David Starr Jordan

Love,
Iz

Heavy moment......

2009-02-13T12:17:00.002-06:00

I am sad. I’m not talking just sad, I’m talking lucky charms, horses, and puppy dogs can’t even cheer me up. I am so broken. This is only the 3rd time in my life I have been this broken. That sad.

I am angry as well. Angry that people don’t think about how their actions will affect others. How they bring themselves into people’s lives and when they walk out of yours, they walk out of your family and friends as well, and don’t bother to be accountable for their actions. You put yourself in that position; the LEAST you could do is answer a phone call for the purpose of respect.

Why do people say empty words? Why do people say things they don’t mean, hoping if they say them they will feel that way? Why do people say things because it’s the heat of the moment, and how can they not realize that they are still empty words? Am I the only person left that says what I mean, and means what I say? I know I am not perfect and I still say things I don’t mean out of anger or hurt, but I try as quickly as possible to rectify that moment.

Is it possible for two people to feel the same way or does one always like/love the other more for it to work? Writing is therapy for me, so bear with me. It might not all make sense but this is how I work things out in my mind. This is not just coming from things in the last few weeks; it’s in part things I have been dealing with for the last 2 years. I guess when you partially heal or just keep trucking, it catches up with you at some point, or maybe the healing process just takes longer than you think with some things and you just think you are over them, so when those healing moments come, you realize, wow, I am still healing.

Don’t get me wrong, I have my strong moments where I feel good. Last night was hard. This morning was hard. I feel good right now.

I know if a person walks away from the best thing they will ever have, they will always compare what they had with that person to anyone they will have from there on. The important things in life are the people that are there for you when your heart is so crushed that the word crushed doesn’t even explain how your heart feels. Your heart hurts so bad, that your guts hurt. The kind of hurt that you have'nt eaten in 2 days because the thought of food makes you sick. Not because of how much you cared for that person but because you gave them the trust they asked for and they walked away from it. Simply put: you trusted them, and they betrayed that trust.

Even though Tim might not know this, I read his blog. haha. If he reads this it will probably shock him. He makes me realize the important things in life. This is a quote from a devotion that really reached my heart “It is easy for people to follow the money, the blessing, the easy way, but the presence of God often leads us through the depths of situations to reveal the power of the Lord into our lives. It is of utmost importance for our ear to be tuned to the moving of the presence of God so we can follow wherever it leads.” God is dealing with me, and I love it, but it’s NOT easy. Maybe this is a part of it. I want to be available. I want the true anointing, the kind that can’t be mistaken, imitated, the pure anointing.

God Help me, please. Make my brokenness beautiful.

All my love and heart,
Izzi

2009-02-12T12:44:00.002-06:00

43 ODD Things about me:

1.Do you like blue cheese? Yes, especially on the black and blue salad at O’Charley’s!

2. Have you ever smoked? No

3. Do you own a gun? No, but all my uncle’s own a few ;)

4.What flavor Kool Aid? Grape, is there another flavor?? :)

5.Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Only if there is a “procedure” involved. *shutters*

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I LOVE them at baseball games, picnic’s and grill out’s, but anywhere else, it makes me sick to my stomach to even THINK about eating one.

7. Favorite Christmas movie? Home Alone 1 & 2

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Ice tea with splenda :)

9. Can you do pushups? A few.

10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? A bracelet given to me by a doctor, my bracelet from one of my best friends for being in her wedding, and a watch. :)

11. Favorite hobby? Photography

12. Do you have ADD? I dunno, hey, what’s that over there??? lol :) Sometimes I do, depends on what I am doing.

13. What's one trait you hate about yourself? I over think/analyze things and my mind runs 90 to nothing at ALL times.

14. What's your middle name? Cole

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment. My heart, Molly and clinic

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? Rockstar, Ice tea, and Diet Pepsi

17. Current worry? Getting out of clinic

18. Current hate right now? Broken hearts.

19. Favorite place to be? With friends and family

20. How did you bring in the New Year? In Houston with my best friends

21. Where would you like to go? Somewhere tropical where the water is warm, crystal blue and I can see the bottom and there is SUN and SAND and WARMTH!!!!

22. Name three people who will complete this? Cher-Roe, Katie and Michelle

23. Do you own slippers? Yes, puppy dog ones. :)

24. What color shirt are you wearing right now? White

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? LOVE them.

26. Can you whistle? Not really, it comes out as a strain lol

27. Favorite color? Pink, green and black

28. Would you be a pirate? If I could call Johnny Depp daddy lol :)

29. What songs do you sing in the shower? Whatever is on the radio, TV, or my ipod

30. Favorite Girl's Name? Rhinada

31. Favorite boy's name? Tucker Cole

32. What's in your pocket right now? Nodda

33. Last thing that made you laugh? Dr. Arakelov asking me if my boyfriend makes 6 figures

34. Worst injury you've ever had? Going through the windshield.

35. Do you love where you live? At times.

36. How many TVs do you have in your house? 6

37. Who is your loudest friend? Meredith Russell

38. How many dogs do you have? 1

39. Does someone have a crush on you? I hope so! :)

40. What is your favorite book? My planner lol :)

41. What is your favorite candy? Now and laters

42. Favorite Sports Team? STL CARDS BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

43. What song do you want played at your funeral? It’s getting hot in here……so take off all your clothes LOL I dunno, I have never thought about it. Ask me later :)

Getting to know you 2009

2009-02-12T12:40:00.001-06:00

Welcome to the new 2009 edition of getting to know your family and friends. Here is what you are supposed to do, and try not to be lame and spoil the fun. Change all the answers so that they apply to you. Then send this to a bunch of people you know, INCLUDING the person who sent it to you. Some of you may get this several times; that means you have lots of friends. The easiest way to do it is to hit 'forward ' so you can change the answers or copy and paste. Have fun and be truthful! I want to see your answers!

1. What is your occupation right now? Nurse ratchet hahaha

2. What color are your socks right now? White and pink

3. What are you listening to right now? Carrie Underwood, last name.

4. What was the last thing that you ate? Colby cheese and wheat thins

5. Can you drive a stick shift? Yes! LOVE them.

6. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Lisa.

7. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Adore her. :)

8. How old are you today? 27.

9. What is your favorite sport to watch on TV. Baseball baby!

10. What is/are your favorite drink(s)? Mango ice tea, ice tea with splenda, diet pepsi, sugar free rockstar, red line, and sugar free monster.

11. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes. Several years ago…..BIG mistake lol

12. Favorite food? Mexican from my favorite places in Houston, La Madeline, and Whataburger.
13. What is the last movie you watched? Another Cinderella story.

14. Favorite day of the year? It’s usually something with a holiday, like Christmas, Thanksgiving, my birthday, 4th of July….things like that.

15. How do you vent anger? Talk it out……which is usually a lot of talking hahaha. :) 100 MPH till I feel understood.

16. What was your favorite toy as a child? Grubby, Lite brite, my little pony, cabbage patch and my glow worm.

17. What is your favorite season(s)? Summer and fall.

18. Cherries or Blueberries? Cherries.

19. Do you want your friends to e-mail you back? Absolutely!

20. Who is the most likely to respond? Your mom :)

21. Who is least likely to respond? Who knows :)

22. Your living arrangements? With my Mow Cow, but hopefully will be able to start looking for houses at some point semi-soon!

23. When was the last time you cried? Today.

24. What is on the floor of your closet? Suit cases, purses, bags and boots.

25. Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending to? Drea, Kim and Ash.

26. What did you do last night? Took a friend home from work, went to the gym, another friend’s house and then home.

27. What are you most afraid of? Not doing the right thing.

28. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Cheese or plain.

29. Favorite dog breed? My mow cow, St. Bernard, or my dream breed a King Charles Spaniel, any really, I love them all!

30. Favorite day of the week? Whatever day I can sleep in. 31. How many states have you lived in? 3

32. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds, but I am not stupid, I will take pearls too. J33. What is your favorite flower? Hydrangea’s and tulips

Lesson's Learned 2008

2009-02-12T12:35:00.002-06:00

Shame on me! I am so sorry I haven't updated in a while. I am going to be better. Just to catch you up a little bit I am still working two jobs. It keeps me running around ½ out of my mind but surprisingly enough I really like it, even after four months of doing it. I was promoted to a surgical nurse and LOVE IT. There is nothing that compares to it. I also "travel" with my own two doctor's and I really like that too.

God had been so good to me in 2008. I usually do a "things learned" blog every year, so I guess this is my "2008 things learned blog," even though it's a couple months late. : ) Here are some of my reflections: It brings to me an array of emotions and thoughts to think that we are who we are for a reason. I know that if we don't like something about ourselves then we can change. We have the power, the tools and hopefully the stamina. Change is HARD. Whether it's something we want to change in our lives or about ourselves there will be an adjustment period and it's NOT comfortable. If you can just make it through the akwardness, you find growth.

I learned that sometimes chances come around twice and you see them differently, be it good, better, or just different.

Through my best friends I have learned what true love is. Unconditional.

I learned that I blush. I never thought I did but I do.

I learned that I get car sick, dont ask, it's a new development in 2008 lol.

I learned that smiles are magic.

I learned to listen to my heart, and go with my "just know" feeling.

I learned it's ok to be who I am, and I love me. It's ok to show that I have faults and show my flaws, they are a form of perfection in it's self.

I learned I think TOO much.

I learned that less is more and living "the simple life" is the good life.

I learned how much I love Texas and the reason I hated it so much was because it was the biggest journey of growth and growing pains HURT!

I learned sacrifice is worth it.

I started using anti-wrinkle cream lol :)

I learned "Home is where your heart is" means your heart can be in more places than one, so can home. ;)

I learned working through fears is a fear in it's self.

These are not all of my lessons learned in 2008, just a few I wanted to take a few mins to share. I am SOOOOOOOO VERY blessed you have you in my life if you are reading this.

Thank you!

Love,
Izzi

TINA TURNER!!!!!!!

2008-10-09T12:26:00.015-05:00

Above: this is where we stood in line.

I am a fan. She is astonishing! The above picture was her opening outfit. This is how it opened: on the two screens on each sides of the screen was this perfect but shaking. The red curtains parted to reveal Tina in black sequins and 4-inch-high heels, standing on a 20-foot steel rod. She opened with “Steamy Windows” as four dancers in a flesh tone, sparkling bikini’s dance provocatively at her sides. There were SIX outfit changes and one nail polish change. The soles of her stiletto’s are RED! She is pure class! The woman has endurance like NONE other. This was her first tour since 2000 and her 50th anniversary of doing this.

It’s not a matter of what love has to do with it. As I was sitting there with my mouth WIDE open like I was catching flies I thought: She turns 69 in next month. There was this screen about half way through the concert that showed footage of her singing the same song she was singing with Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones, YEARS ago, Tina looks FABUOLOUS at 68, on the other hand, Jagger turned 65 in July and well is on the other end of the spectrum, is all I will say! So it’s not what’s love got to do with it……it’s what's age got to do with it?

Here is one outfit change:

She had a five-piece band, two background singers and four dancers who looked they like walked straight out of a Victoria Secrets catalog. She jumped in line with them and shook what her momma gave her right along with them. Her voice when she talked you could tell she is “mature” but when she sang….honey she BELTED it and it sounded strong, like she was 19. She sang with guys in her band and her backup singers. One of her backup singers is Lisa Fischer, (she had a list of credits at the end) took over a couple times so Tina could do a wardrobe change, she has a PHENOMENAL voice, she blew me away.

At the end, the very last song was “Nut Bush”, she was standing a narrow strip of runway at least eight feet above the crowd in the first 20 rows. Dancing. In high heels. I kid you negative!!! It swung back and forth over the audience. She did this for like 20 mins. Here is her leaning over the rail of it, singing to the crowd:

This show was mind-boggling. No bumps, glitches or mishaps and she still has the endurance, durability and enthusiasm of performers much younger than she is. I went there not knowing what to think or expect but I left there with an understanding of why so women, either her age or close, (even girls my age) LOVE her. She represents realness, strength, survival, and success. You can just tell she earned on her own way. None like her will come along soon……if ever.

P.S. I will try to post more pics of her different outfit changes as I find them.

What's love got to do with it........

2008-10-08T11:20:00.006-05:00

I am SOOOOOOO excited!!!!!! I might find out what love has to do with it tonight!!!! I get to see Tina Turner in concert!!! My seats are AMAZING, row 19. WOW! I will let you know how fabulous her legs really are, haha!

AGH, it’s only 50 degrees outside!!!!!! This morning I am sure it was much colder than that. OH PEOPLE! FOR THE LOVE OF BOB, WHHHHHYYYYYYY does Missouri have to get SOOOOO cold? I am going to Texas in November and I cannot wait!!!!!

My baby Kenzie was dedicated this last Sunday….look at this face!!!!

And I have to show my baby girl Kiera off too, she is getting SO big. This is her new “big girl” hair. She looks like a little Who!

AGH, I LOVE them SOOO MUCH!

On another note I am failing miserably to get up before 7am. Ugh. This is SO hard. The other morning I set my alarm for 5am and I kinda, sorta, subconsciously remember it going off but don’t remember what happened, and then I woke up at 7. It’s crazy; I am surviving off of Rockstar. Buy stock people, it’s safe because it’s basically what is running through my veins, not blood ha-ha. I haven’t had one today though and I feel pretty good. I got good sleep last night. It just takes me a while to wake up I think. My body wakes up at 7 and my mind joins it about 10! I can’t resist posting this, my friend Andrea sent it to me and I LOVE it. It strikes me as really funny.

FIVE BEST THINGS TO SAY IF YOU GET CAUGHT SLEEPING AT YOUR DESK:

NUMBER 5: They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen.

NUMBER 4: This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time-management course you sent me to.

NUMBER 3: Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-out. You probably got here just in time!

NUMBER 2: Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?

NUMBER 1: And MY all time favorite best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk : (Raising your head slowly) '... in Jesus' name, Amen

Here is the thought of the day: “When you make a mistake, don’t look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.” - Hugh White

Have a WONDERFUL day!!

XOXO
Elizabeth

It's a Monday folks..............

2008-10-06T09:14:00.002-05:00

Ok, so I didn’t wake up “early” this morning. This is going to be hard. I just wanted to sleep for a few hours. Have you ever wanted to call in and say I will be late this morning and just sleep in? I almost did that last week.

I am having the breakfast of champions this morning, cheese it’s and ice tea. YUM. I have to get some caffeine in my system…..SOON! I don’t have an energy drink this morning. Bummer. I have clinic three days this week, it’s going to be a long week.

Ok, I have to get on a positive note this morning so here is the thought of the day: “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” - John Lennon. That’s good stuff.

Guess who is was here this weekend in KC? Sara Evans! She was down at the P&LD last night. It was exciting down there yesterday. I was driving downtown and these two homeless people started yelling at each other. It was sad in a sense but funny in another because they were fighting about if one was following the other or not. I took Molly down to the plaza last night; she’s such a good girl. We walked around and had ice cream from Coldstone Creamery. YUM! I had this chocolate with nuts and white chocolate chips in it, SOOOOOOO GOOD! Went and ate it in front of one of my favorite fountains. Molly loved it. The fountain was pink yesterday for breast cancer awareness. Here is a pic of it:

Well, I need to get my charts done, hope everyone has a FANTASTIC day!

All my love,
Izzy

When pumpkins drink too much.....

2008-10-03T20:52:00.004-05:00

Haha!!! It's FALL!!!!!!!!!! It's almost that time......Halloween!!!!

Ok, I am REALLY dreading the cold weather folks. I have had a "taste" of it at night the in the last week and lemme just tell ya...........it's not good! What I am I going to do? I am used to two temperatures, warm and HOT. haha. I MISS TEXAS!!!!!

Working two jobs is KILLIN me people. I am sitting at work right now as a matter of fact. Only one hour left.....WOOT WOOT!!!

Who watched the debate last night with Biden and Palin and loved it as much as I did? I am not one to "discuss" politics but I really did love it. I think people will really learn a lot through these debates.

Ok, I have a confession, ready for it? Come closer......I am about to try to take a HUGE step in life. I am talking LIFE changing people. I have decided to "try" to become more of a morning person. STOP LAUGHING!!!!! I know, I LOOOOOOOVE my sleep but, I am trying to become a master of time management and I think that if I wake up earlier it will start my day off better. I am not talking EVERY single morning, just like 3 mornings a week. I have to start out slllllow! If you know me, you know how MUCH I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE sleeping in. I am going hold myself accountable, I am going to blog about this new step. Brace your self for some GRUMPY blogs haha!!

As many of you know I love quotes and I usually e-mail a quote of the day that either gets sent to me by e-mail or one I have read and/or has really spoken to me. Here are a couple I have gotten this week that hit my heart the hardest:

"Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Love the ones who don't just because you can. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Kiss slowly. Forgive quickly. God never said life would be easy. He just promised it would be worth it. "

“Whatever you want to do, do it now. There are only so many tomorrows.” - Michael Landon

Here's to yet another blog......I am feeling a "lessons learned" blog coming on.......soon. ;)

Love y'all!

Izzy

Introducing.................

2008-09-15T09:40:00.004-05:00

Kole!!! This is my new car! Isn't he cute?!?!? Just thought I would share the exciting news! I had to trade Marco in, it was mixed emotions. Sad, but happy because he had so many problems I couldn't afford anymore.

Other news: I got a second job! I never thought I would be SO thankful to work 70-80 hour weeks. It's REALLY nice to be able to pay my bills!

I saw Vicky, Christina, Barcelona this weekend and here is my review: I didn’t like movie as a whole. I hated the plot. It started out good with two best friends going somewhere incredible and they could have had this GREAT journey of growth but instead all that came of it was doubt, infidelity and hurt. I hated the cheating and the 3 way love triangle. Someone always gets hurt, and Maria Elena did. It crushed her. They perfectly described Juan Antonio as a slithering snake. I can’t stand men who do the things he did.

I loved the way it was shot and the scenery. I thought Barcelona was BEAUTIFUL and loved the locations it showed. That’s all I liked and all that made the movie worthwhile.

This weekend I had so many things on my mind to blog about but, as I sit here at my desk this morning drinking my rockstar my mind is blank. I had a GREAT weekend. I hope everyone else did too, as I think of what I was going to blog about I will write more later.

Much love,

Elizabeth

Lunch Blog......

2008-09-04T14:32:00.006-05:00

R.I.P. "Goldy" my Blackberry. I know she is NOT in a better place. *sniff* But I do have HAPPY news! I will welcome a new Blackberry into my open arms tomorrow!!!!! He is white, since they don't make gold ones anymore and doesn't have a name, so I am open to suggestions.

I just wanted to say how grateful I am for friends and family in my life. Last Sunday I was talking to someone who has known me since I was 3 or 4 years old. She was telling me how she was going to read my blog to be nosy and keep up on my life. How BLESSED am I that she would want to?!?!? She is SO classy and real. The kind of woman I would love to be. She touched my heart and I love her SO VERY MUCH!! I have thought so much about this in the last week. People are SO strategically placed in our lives. To tell you the truth, I am more thankful than I have EVER been for people in my life. The only reason I will even have a phone tomorrow is because of someone who has made me the person I am today by being in my life. I LOVE my friends. You have made my heart in the last couple weeks beat, without you, it wouldn't want to. ;) XOXO There are no words to say how thankful I am for you.

On another note I had the MOST amazing Labor Day weekend. It was WONDERFUL, and relaxing and I enjoyed it to the FULLEST. I am SUCH a lucky girl, right Boo? ;) I will have to figure out how to put a slide show on here, it shouldn't be too hard and post some pictures for everyone to see.

ALL my love,

Elizabeth

See these? They are angry eyebrows!

2008-08-27T11:57:00.004-05:00

There is a reason for the angry eyebrows. This is my reaction today to how I feel. There was a time for tears as well but today.......the angry eyebrows.

My phone was STOLEN. Bummer. BIG bummer. We went to a restaurant and I answered a call from a friend who had delivered her baby at 7:16pm BTW CONGRATS GEITA!!!!!!!!!! Baby Savannah is here! 8lbs!!!Ok, back to angriness, so after I talked to Randy at 8:32 I hung up, ate and we left. We were the LAST customers to leave and we weren’t even gone but about 10 minutes. By the time we came back it was GONE. GOOOONE! No more. Not there. Disappeared. No more gold blackberry. So when you call my number for right now you will hear “at the subscribers request, this phone does not accept incoming calls” My work number is how you can reach me during the day. I have a direct line. E-mail me if you need the number.

*sigh* Alas, you know me, the angry eye brows will go away soon but give me my five mins. :)

On a happy note I get a new cell phone! I am excited about that! I wish it were a different one but none the less let's keep it bright! :)

Here is a survey that was fun to fill out....twice. haha. I filled it out once with the first 9 questions missing and for a small group of friends and then again today when it go sent around at work. Have fun and fill it out for me too....I probably e-mailed it to you. :)

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:00am
2. Diamonds or pearls? Both :)
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? The Dark Knight…..SO GOOD!
4. What is your favorite TV show(s)? Grey’s, Pushing Daisy’s and Ugly Betty
5. What do you usually have for breakfast? I don’t have a “breakfast routine”, just whatever sounds good or what is convenient.
6. What is your middle name? Cole (I could be a brand haha)
7. What food do you dislike? Beets, liver, veal, duck, sushi, seafood, lamb, deer or anything else I consider “gross”
8. What is your favoriteCD at the moment? I love mixed CD’s that I can make that have all my favorites on it.
9. What kind of car do you drive? Marco is a Grand Am (he’s polo green :))
10. Favorite sandwhich? Turkey, bacon, avacado, cheese, lettuce, and tomato. YUM! :)
11. What characteristic do you despise? Liars and arrogance.
12. Favorite item of clothing? Um, whatever is cute and comfy.
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Somewhere tropical and exotic.
14. Favorite brand of clothing? My dream brand that I can rarely afford is Michael Kors
15. Where would you retire to? The south. :)
16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? I have many.
17. Favorite sport to watch? Baseball baby!!!!!! GO CARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
18. Farthermost place you are sending this? I sent it to China.
19. Person you expect to send it back first? Whoever wants to. :)
20. When is your birthday? March 25th write that down people! :)
21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Depends on what I’m doing. I was 100% a night person but the older I get I am starting to enjoy mornings more.
22. What is your shoe size? 7 or 8
23. Pets? Molly Bella.
24. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? Looks like I will be getting a new cell phone since mine was stolen. :)
25. What did you want to be when you were little? English teacher.
26. How are you today? Good, slightly disappointed but getting over it. :)
27. What is your favorite candy? Take5
28. What is your favorite flower? I LOVE, hydrangea’s, tulips and lily's
29. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? September 12th
30. What is your full name? Elizabeth Cole Tucker
31. What are you listening to right now? Work noise, and a CD that I made while I was in Houston.
32. What was the last thing you ate? Chocolate Milk :) :) :)
33. Do you wish on stars? Absolutely!
34. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? A custom pink or green.
35. How is the weather right now? 76 and sunny....really pretty.
36. The first person you spoke to on the phone today? My mommo.
37. Favorite soft drink? Diet pepsi
38. Favorite restaurant? La Madeline, Pappasito's, Whataburger (BEST shakes EVER)
39. Real hair color? Brown
40. What was your favorite toy as a child? My barbies or baby dolls.
41. Summer or winter? SUMMER I HATE WINTER!!!!
42. Hugs or kisses? Both!
43. Chocolate or Vanilla? Depends!
44. Coffee or tea? Tea
45. Do you want your friends to email you back? Yes.
46. When was the last time you cried? When my phone was stolen. :(
47. What is under your bed? Organized containers
48. What did you do last night? Went to Los Tules :)
49. What are you afraid of? Spiders, snakes, lizzards, june bugs, bugs period, lol you name it, I run screaming :)
50. Salty or sweet? Both.
51. How many keys on your key ring? 5 I think
52. How many years at your current job? all added together = 3
53. Favorite day of the week? Any good day. :)
54. How many towns have you lived in? Towns? um, like 7
55. Do you make friends easily? Yes
56. How many people will you send this to? You. :)
57. How many will respond? Whoever wants to. :)

MUCH LOVE!!!

Elizabeth

Now for what's CURRENT! 8/26/08

2008-08-26T10:40:00.004-05:00

Oh me, oh my!!! I thought I would create this little blog site for everyone to read what goes on in my crazy little world. :) I posted all my "Texas journal entries" that I've sent out. I thought it was significant since this is where it all started. I think I left out one or two that I could'nt find, such as the one with my "Dicks" story in it. I am sure all that read that one, it' still burned into your memory for a long time haha.

So for what's current: I moved back to KC at the tail end of December. It's hard to believe it's already been 8 months. I've had my moments and up's and downs of LOVING being here and then DYING to go back to Texas. It's been like any adjustment but recently got a little better, thanks to a special someone. ;) It's funny to see who I've remained close to and who I am close to now since moving back. I love and cherish my friends SO MUCH. They are everything to me and I realize how blessed I am to have such good ones. I came back to work at the same company, as a nephrology nurse and still love it, they are SO good to me. I am not going to quit school, I am however, going to have to take it class by class right now. I am working full time, trying to get a second job and starting some new things which I will say more about later. I'm staying busy!

I've found a lot of new spots in KC thanks to my special squeeze who's shown me a lot of really neat places. I am the MOST excited about finding good mexican food......WOOT WOOT. For all those wanting a review I will tell you the BEST places are Los Tules, which is off Broadway accross the stree from the new performing arts center being built, Mi Ranchito, in old Overland park off 87th (?) or so and Rudy's Tenampa Taqueria off Westport Rd.

Well, welcome to my blog spot! I need to go for now but check back soon for a new update.

Love y'all!

Elizabeth

A random journal entry…..*written and e-mailed October 7th, 2007

2008-08-26T10:37:00.002-05:00

Is it human nature to want something more or start to appreciate it if we didn't…..if we knew we were going to lose it? No matter what it is, whether it be a relationship, friendship, or time in your life. For example, I have watched personally two people love someone, the other person not return it but as soon as that person has moved on, they come back around knowing they are hurting something but don't care. They all of a sudden want them back, because they had seen what they have with another person. Is it because they had that once with them and want it back? Do they REALLY appreciate it or do they just want it because they know they lost it or don't want anyone else to have it? Do feelings for someone you love really go away and how do you explain when they change...even if you don't want them to? Why are these things in life so hard to sort through, figure out and learn?

I don't get this. I have spent most of the day studying, so blame it on my brain being homework fried. J Ever have a day where you fight with yourself? I have spent most of the day doing just that. We are almost at peace, lol but my heart and mind just won't settle down. They can't agree. lol We've (my heart, mind and I) have just about done it all today, laughed, cried, been mad, happy, confused, content, and even sat on the trunk of my car and thought while we watched it storm. Consider that as your warning before reading on. I think I am moving home in December when my semester is done. I am 90% sure. It's for several reasons, and for the good……I think. I am just so mixed, so I write. Lucky you. I know not many will read this whole thing so it's ok. Most will read the beginning and the end, so I can pretty much say what I want in the middle.

There's a song that kinda describes how I feel: "I used to run in circles going nowhere fast. Take one step forward and look two steps back, I couldn't walk a straight line even if I wanted to. Sometimes it's hard for me to understand, but your teaching me to be a better man" This is not necessarily exactly how I feel. I feel like I am going somewhere, but at the same time it's so slow. I feel like I am sitting there watching a plant grow. I know everything happens for a reason. I LOVE home. I just wrote last week how there is no place like it and it's SO true. But how is it that all of a sudden I don't know if I want to move back and why am I scared? I know some reasons that I am scared. I am coming home with only ½ of what I wanted to accomplish and that's intimidating. I also know one of the people I have loved the most in my life is no longer there. He was my security when I had none. He was my crutch when I needed something to lean on. He was my laughter, even when I didn't want to laugh. He cried with me when I cried, and told me the truth when I didn't want to hear it. He was the one thing that could break my spirit when I needed something to reach my heart. He brought me so much happiness and I have never even told him. It's always been unspoken. He became my flesh and blood and I don't even know when, or how, or why it happened. I feel like I have been out of touch and I know that is only normal but it scares me at the same time. I am starting to know what I will miss being here, and I feel scared I will miss out on something by moving back. I have seen where I have grown while I have been gone and how will people deal with that? I am not the same person, What will they think of that? Will they be accepting?

I am leaving someone here who I love more than life it's self. She has become a friend when I needed one the most. One of the very best things to ever happen to me in my life. She loves me for who I truly am. I have never had to be anything for her to unconditionally love me for me. She is literally a priceless jewel. I know you never lose who you really love but it's hard to be with a person pretty much every day for a year and then all of a sudden they are ganked from your everyday life. She is literally like family. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt God sent her to me as a gift. She is my God given angel in flesh. So real, so sweet and I love her more than anything. The thought of not seeing her every day simply put literally hurts my heart so bad. It rips it out to be honest. There's another song that summing it up says "I asked a man the secret to life and he said all I can say is 100 years goes faster than you think, don't blink." Life does go by so fast, remember that plant I was just talking about? It's like as soon as you take your eyes off it, it grows and it's gone by and you missed it, but if you would have watched it you almost wouldn't have seen the growth. Make sense?

Another line in that same song says "When your hour glass runs out of sand, you can't flip it over and start again." I know that this last year has changed me as a person. Thank God, because I never want to remain the same, I want to constantly be changing into what he wants me to be, but I don't want my hour glass to run out of sand before I am done, but are we supposed to feel "done" when it does? I know in life there are also times you find out who your friends are. This is a hard lesson, the people in our lives come and go but there are some that will ALWAYS be there. I'm SO thankful for those. They have been pillars in my life and I am more grateful for them than EVER. I know I have become a better person in the last year, but why all of a sudden is the place I hated so much at one time the place I now don't want to leave? I NEVER thought I wouldn't want to go back home, but there's a part of me who doesn't. Why?
There's a new wind blowing that I've never known. I'm letting go of my past. There are times in our lives we have to do this, more than once, it's like a annual thing, lol. It's like a figurative tossing of the ashes of a urn into the ocean. God let me find your grace in every mistake I make, and always give more than I take. Does anyone understand any of this? I have always been transparent. I hate it, but God has created me like this for a purpose. If you have any pearls of wisdom I would love to hear them about right now. Thanks for letting me vent.

I guess this is just giving me a head start on my "lessons learned" journal entry for next year. Wow, it's already started! Can't a sista get a break up in dis thang called life? Lesson not learned yet..stay tuned I guess, to watch the plant grow, lol where do I get my analogies? Note to self: I've got to get better ones.

Much love,
Elizabeth

Crazy story about my phone.....*written and emailed 9/25/07

2008-08-26T10:37:00.001-05:00

Ya see what happened was.......lol Ok so I was giving this kid a ride to their car today, cause you know that's just how great I am, lol just kidding and I sat my back pack and phone down on my trunk to find my keys. I guess I forgot to pick my phone back up with my back pack because I turned out into the main street (which is REALLY busy) and wheeeeeeee......there goes my phone OFF my trunk and into the road. It was like slow mo and {!} BAM {!} ran over. Funeral services will be held for this tragic and freaky death tomorrow at 2 o'clock on beamer at San Jacinto College. A donation fund will be set up in it's name and you can make all checks payable to me. :( All I can say is IS IT JUST ME?!?!?!?!?!? :( lol Why do all these things happen to me??? Am I the only one???? Ok, final word. I have a Texas number for right now. I still have my other number and if you have it KEEP it, but add this number to it: 832-425-7854. My other Missouri number is still working but has a voice mail telling you this and for the next four or so days to use this number. One last request: PLEASE e-mail me your contact information again PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!!! Thanks! :)

Elizabeth

Wow it's been awhile! *written and e-mailed 9/23/07

2008-08-26T10:35:00.001-05:00

It's been awhile since I have done one of these. I have been meaning to do one sooner but I feel like I am running around lately with my under roo's on fire! *yelp* lol :) School is going good. It takes up most of my time. I am taking Math, Composition, Nutrition and Anatomy and Physiology this semester and I am determined to kick their hind end instead of them kicking mine…..I will let you guess who is winning right now. I think I have had a collective of 16 hours of sleep this week. lol :) I have started doing quite a bit of photography and LOVE it. I am learning SO much. I am getting involved in the childrens ministry in the church and am excited. I work a lot, when I am not at work, I am at school, when I am not at school I am at work, at least that's what it feels like, lol. So it's been about a year and a couple months that I have been down here in the arm pit of America. lol Seriously, it's not THAT bad anymore, in fact I have come to love some th ings about Houston. About this time last year I did a reflection e-mail, about various lessons I had learned in that year and such. Well this year has been quite the journey so I figured I would do it again Sam! :)

I wrote this the other day: I am not usually one to write about my relationship with God. Maybe I should write on this topic more, but, I usually save it for my private, daily, journal entries. I don't tend to be of a really serious nature or to be vulnerable often, but I can't help as I sit here at school, in the open lab doing homework for my nutrition class to open a new document and write about what I am feeling right now. I doubt many will even read this but if you do this is my epiphany. I have my mp3 player on and the song "I bowed on my knees" is playing. The power and presence of God is so near and upon me it's unreal. I am so humbled he is with me wherever I am. I am so proud to call him my abba father, my very best friend and my God, the ruler of my life. I want to bow on my knees right now and cry holy. I want to clap my hands and sing glory to the son of God. I want to see the gates of the city of heaven and see my loved ones and friends there. I want to see t he angels, Abraham, Jacob, Isaac. I want to talk to David and see really how alike our hearts are. I want to most of all see Jesus. JESUS!!!!! I want to bow on my knees and I can't even imagine or begin to say what I will feel or what I think I would feel even writing this. HE IS SO GOOD! He is doing so many things in my life right now. There is not enough praise to be given, not enough time to give it and not a way to praise him to show him how I truly feel. I feel so limited with mere words to express myself. I love him…….I really really really LOVE him. I am so IN love with him. I want to show this to him and live my life showing it. I know I am not perfect, but he never said he looked for perfection, just someone to be his hands, feet and voice. I want to be that. He died for ME…..wow. Thank you Jesus. Thank you from the very soul of my being, the very core of who and what I am for all you do for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know it's not much and not even half of what I am feeling or thinking but I just wanted to take a moment to say he is so very special to me.

* I've learned there is a lot of vulnerability in life, love and with God. Trust is a vulnerable thing, and it's almost if not as delicate as life.

* I have learned that life is like a country song. My life and I are like a country song. If I could write a song that would describe me and my life it would have things like this in it (some of these are actually lines from songs): Show me a woman or a man who's got a plan and I will show you god is laughin' out his window. You must admit, you can't predict the way the pieces fit. Life is as uncertain as the wind blows. Lately I've been thinkin, which could be a dangerous thing. I'd take a one way ticket on a west bound plane wearing shades, ten bucks in my pocket and when I landed I would be able to do what I want to do, go where I want to go, be with who I wanted to be with. I'd sit in the sand, kick my shoes off and lay on a blanket, I'd look at the stars in the sky and wonder where the people in the airplanes are going. I'd watch the sun set, and then it rise. Looking across the sea knowing that I am loved, I'd wonder why certain people don't love me anymore and what causes love to change. Why is it that I give up on love but my heart still believes it will find it?

* I've learned there is nothing better in this life than God, family, true friends, music, hair spray, caffeine, baseball (GO CARDS!), and the feeling of summer.

* I've learned It's not what people can do for you but what you can do for each other. I went and fed the homeless for the first time. I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt there is no feeling like it and I don't think I could put it into words if I wanted. The sight of them running, pushing and yelling as they rush at you knowing what you are there with. You are literally handing them a piece of their survival, life, and nourishment. It's the epitome of the definition of ministry. The stories some of them told me are forever burned into my memory along with a prayer for them.

* I've learned I know what love is and still the lessons of it are hard to learn. It hands out hard kicks and lessons you will never understand. Yet you don't have love till you have the kind you can give away, even with risks of getting hurt.

*I've learned that life is like flying down some back road at midnight with your eyes closed and the headlights off.

*I have learned a personal lesson and interpretation of the verse Hebrews 11:1. "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." I personally think the saying "Love is bind" should be changed to "Faith is blind" because it is. You have to have the faith even without being able to see it. You have to go on it with a hope, and without evidence that it's there.

*I've learned it's easier to do things you know you can't do when you have no choice and have to do them.

*I've learned the sincere meaning of "There's No Place Like Home" You said it Dorothy, girl you preach it! :)

*I've learned you never stop needing direction in life.

*I've learned that God really is there when you need him THE MOST, and you have absolutely no one or nothing else in your life, and he is the most stable, reliable, and irresistible thing in this life.

*I've learned I miss being cool. lol :) (will I ever grow up?)

These are not even half of my lessons learned, this has been a productive year of journeys and it's not even over! I love each and everyone of you, if I don't then I sent this to you on accident. Just joking! :) lol Thank you for loving me and allowing me to be transparent. I hope to see everyone at home for Mantle. I don't want to make this too long but I thought I would drop a line. Write me soon!

Love, Elizabeth

Written and e-mailed 3/22/07

2008-08-26T10:34:00.000-05:00

Hola.....in the spirit of viva los houston....ok, so anyone that se habla espanol I am sure will laugh at me but at least it brought a smile to SOMEONE'S face in this e-mail list! :)

It's been awhile since I have written everyone and I've surprisingly gotten a lot of requests to start this craziness up again! If you'd like to be taken off the list then let me know. I got a few complaints that my e-mails were too long so I took that as a general consensus and stopped. It won't offend me if you don't want my long, crazy stories, I don't blame you! haha :)

As far as how things are going for me down here in T-Haus (a nick name for Texas, I oddly picked up somewhere but don't ask where because I can't remember) things are going pretty good!!! *surprise, surprise!* (That was for you Pyle!) I have adjusted semi well and actually LIKE Texas and see good in it!! *GASP* I know!!!!! I really like school here, even though it's hard I like it a lot. I've made a couple of "friends" and have fallen somewhat into a "comfort zone". My schedule is extraordinarily full and I am really busy so that helps A LOT. I was working as a nanny until I couldn't handle the parents any longer. That story being an e-mail all in its self makes me grind my grits and if you want details for the sake of length here, call or e-mail me and you might be thankful for your job! I LOVE my new job!! I work in the bookstore part time at my school and so it's allowed me to have a lot more social contact and that just makes life better in its self!!! :)

So speaking of nick names for Texas brings to my mind some of the odd sayings I hear people say down here. Here are some of my favorites: #1). Over Yonder #2). Ya Reckon? #3). I'll say....(say what???) #4). Tell you what. Then they don't finish and when I ask…tell me what??? They are like huh? lol it's funny.

I still have my crazy adventures for example: I was driving through Sonic a while ago and Molly, my trusty, wild, side kick horse of a dog, lol was accompanying me. It was so nice outside and I had all my windows down. I was in the midst of ordering when out of the corner of my eye I saw a guy riding by on a skate board. I didn't even think twice about it or have time to for that matter because Molly LEAPS out of the passenger seat window and goes running after him!!!!!!!! Not even blinking an eye; I yell at the order speaker OH MY GOSH, MY DOG JUST JUMPED OUT OF MY CAR.....HANG ON! So I proceed to jump out of my car, leaving the keys and it running with waiting people behind me waiting to order chasing after her. lol Picture me chasing my dog, my dog chasing this guy and this guy just running for his life because this dog looks like it’s going to eat him when in truth she just wants to play. I am running and yelling at her to stop, at this guy to stop…..it was a mess! When it was all said and done and I regained a half of a breath I almost killed her and myself!

With the weather getting warmer keep me in your prayers, last night I had to dodge about 20 overly obese June bugs looking like a complete idiot when one few in my hair and I threw myself down the stairs of my apartment screaming "It's in my hair, It's in my hair". I really need to grow up, lol but I CAN'T in that area!!!! Bugs are just GROSS! Hard to believe I will be 26 this Sunday huh? It does make me feel good though when all these 18 yr old kids @ school guess me to be 22!!! I guess I am just and always will be young at heart! :)

I recently went home for spring break and had a BLAST!!!!!!! It was SOOOOO good to load up on some homemade lovin!!!! :) I LOOOOOVE my new church building, it's SOOOO beaudimus! :) When I took the grand tour of every nook and cranny I felt the essence of every time I have ever been home sick all rolled into one feeling when I walked into the prayer room. It was amazing. I also LOOOOOOVE the surgery suite, I always love the feeling of walking into a surgical room. It's so encouraging and gives me this empowering kick to feel like "I can do this". lol. Thank you all for your time. I thoroughly enjoyed getting to hang out with everyone! While being home I had about 50 epiphany's about my life since I've moved away and since I've only been back in Texas for 2 days I am still dwelling on them and trying to make sense out of all my thoughts. I will share more about that maybe in my next e-mail.

My dearest friend sent me this e-mail with this survey and it looked fun so I thought I would include it. I tried to think of answers that were interesting or that most people don't know about me. If you want I would love for you to fill it out and send it back but you don't have to. This still ended up being longer than I thought but much love to all!!!!

Later!
Love,
Eliza"beth"

Written and e-mailed 8/28/06

2008-08-26T10:29:00.000-05:00

Hey! I hope everyone had a great weekend! Here is yet another e-mail about my adventures so you can laugh and be kept up to date! I know some people from work and church aren't going to understand different parts but just skip over it and read on! :) I know I told you I got lost last week but let me tell you more! lol On top of being lost for an hour and in the process missing church, my window's began to fog up. So what do I do? Turn on my defrost right? No, that didn't work. So I rolled all my windows down thinking if the inside of the car was the same temperature as the outside it would get better and de-fog. NO! Well I started to panic when it just kept getting worse and worse so after people flashing their brights, honking at me and yelling profanity because I was driving so slow and swaggering all up in the lane, I just pulled over. I called my mom and bawled hysterically as if she was going to be able to do anything about it and asked why on earth I decided to move to this God forsaken humid, abnormally sized roach, frog, crazy kind of bugs never seen before infested state! lol When I gathered myself together because my other line was beeping I answered it and it was this girl that I met that goes to the same church calling me. She told me it was ok, and said turn your defrost on and turn it to heat instead of air. I was like IT'S 145 DEGREES OUTSIDE WITH 360% HUMIDITY...WHY THE HONK TURN THE HEAT ON?!?!? Well it worked none the less but I am still puzzled by this.

Oh well! The other day when I first got here I saw this bug when I was driving. It was two bugs and they were hooked together from their rear end's! I laughed and I pointed to it through the window telling my mom look at this freak bug! Well I learned differently the other day when I stepped out on my porch that there are more than just one....or two.....they are a "kind" of bug here! I asked about it and they are called "love bugs" because I guess they get stuck together. Well if you ask me it didn't look much like love because they try to crawl in two different directions when they land as I observed and if I learned ANYTHING from the message I heard SO many times growing up "Life's Second Greatest Decision" you can't marry someone and it be good if you are going in two different directions!!!! lol So it's past my comprehension why they call them "love bugs". lol :)

My allergies have just been beyond anything I can compare it to and have made me sicker than a dog. I went to bed Friday night after loading up on allergy and congestion meds at about 11 pm and didn't wake up until 6:40 pm on Saturday!!! I haven't slept much because I can't breathe and I am not used to my apartment. But at least I am not waking up wondering where in God's country I am anymore! lol In the allergy department I am adjusting and they are not so bad today as they have been and I can breathe! WHOO HOOO!!! I am more excited than you know! :) lol.

I miss my friends and church something TERRIBLE!!!! Sunday was "different" to say the least. It was odd waking up at 9 am to get ready for church and being at church at 10:30 am was crazy and so “off” for me but being there till 1pm for ONE MORNING SERVICE was just almost more than I could take! It was promotion Sunday for them and I missed Brother Tinsley being up there making us laugh and all our funny and sweet kids. I went home for lunch then shopping with Abel and then BACK to church. They asked me if I wanted to join choir and I said I would come to practice to see and I had to be there at 4:45. I wasn't comfortable enough to sing but it was fun and looks like something I will be getting involved in. They have cool choir robes! :) I was ok until alter call and then it hit me. I missed my church SOOOOOOO bad!!!!!!!!!! As I looked around I missed people hearing my pastor preach and pour himself and his heart out. Looking up on the platform to see praise singers I know and love. For example; I wanted a hug from Sis. Smalley SO bad, and I missed hearing her and seeing her pray for people and talking my girl smack lol with Jenn Huey and Teresa Morgans, The Ghodes family how sweet they are and how humble he is, Ginger Robinson and her crazy self and her hug and kiss, Sitting by and hugging, laughing and talking with my lil brothers Jonathon and Michael. Just things like that!! :) I was ok until the pastor’s wife told me how her oldest daughter just got married and how she is having a hard time adjusting and asked me if I needed anything! Then I got tears in my eyes and I was like “I'm ok! *sniff*” lol

Today was my first day of class and I had English/writing and math. I really liked my english/writing class we had to tell about ourselves like our names, major, and all that jazz in front of the class and so I told them all about how I missed my job and Midwest Nephrology and all the people there and how I loved the crazy place! lol :) I HATED math....I will just say this to sum up how I feel: AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! My teacher is a hippie, some kind of crazy religion and just out there!!!! He talked more about politics, his opinions and how he hates Texas rather than math, lol I dunno...he might wind up being ok though. Well, I am sure I have bored you enough for now if you see someone who's e-mail address I don't have please send it to them...I might not have it or have lost it or haven't gotten it in my e-mail address book yet. I will write more later and I am charging my camera to take pics this week!!!! I love and miss EVERYONE!!!!!
XOXO
Eliza"beth"

P.S. Here is one funny story about the "Love Bugs" no offense to anyone, just thought it was funny! This was e-mailed to me and just made my day! "Just wanted you to know a little story about "love" bugs. My grandpa always called them "Baptist" bugs. He said that like Baptists, they always stick together, but they can't face each other. You know, like, "once saved always saved, but don't ask me what I did on Saturday night". It's corny but it helps give a bit of different perspective on bugs that make you need to wash your car every day."

Written and e-mailed 8/24/06

2008-08-26T10:28:00.000-05:00

It's me again!!!! Hope this all finds you well, I was SO happy to hear from you guys!!!!! Keep it coming!!!! Some of this might be a repeat for some of you because I have e-mailed you but you’re going to read it again!!!! :) Here are a couple pictures of the outside of my apartment....I will take more as I am settled but all I can say is THANK GOD FOR AIR CONDITIONING!!!!! I am so alone here. lol I have met a few people but it's hard to know who to trust yet so I am just kinda keeping to myself and unpacking. Time is flying though and I can't believe I start school on Monday already. AGH! I went to pick up my books and they weighed like 50 pounds and my heart was beating so fast and so hard!!!!! :) I did get a job offer though....when I went to pick up my books the girl beside me offered me a job at hooters!!!!! I told her I would get back to her on that! :)

In addition to the roaches there are frogs!!!!!! I rented this garage to store my things in till I moved in and I have been moving in at night because the heat during the day is ungodly and I saw at least 5 frogs hopping around on the ground at the base of the stairs! It was crazy!!!! The big hair is because of the humidity, I am finding that out as mine is absolutely uncontrollable!
I love my apartment...I will be taking pictures soon of the inside but I am sending a couple of the outside today. The humidity is never ending....even at night it's bad! I got lost for the first time last night....for about an hour! That was a mess and I still don't know where I was! lol Oh well...... I have cried a lot and I am so very home sick but I am determined to stick it out! I will do another e-mail updating everyone probably today or tomorrow, I have to go now...I still don’t have internet at my apartment....hopefully I will have it by the weekend but I am on the computer here in the office and someone else needs it....I will be on later though!!! I love everyone!!!!!!!!!! E-mail soon!!!!

Love,
Elizabeth

Written and e-mailed to everyone 8/22/06

2008-08-26T10:25:00.000-05:00

HELLO EVERYONE!!!!!!! :) I am sorry I haven't checked in before now but my Internet has not been working! My apartment isn't even ready until this afternoon. I am e-mailing everyone from the business center at the hotel I am staying at until it's ready! As most of you already know, I have moved to Texas to go to school and I have arrived!

We (my parents and I) got in Friday night....with the U-Haul it took us 14 HOURS to get here!!! AGH! We checked in, and my friend who made the reservation...made it at the wrong hotel! After we got checked in and settled everywhere that was "good" to eat was closed so we just ate Arby's and went to bed! lol Saturday when we woke up we went to see if my apartment was ready and it wasn't as you already know so we went and unloaded my car into the hotel room, went and ate and then had ice cream on the beach and walked around in Galveston and went to Kema. Sunday we went to church and the people were SO friendly and I already knew the pastor from when I was younger and so it was great to re-connect with him and his wife. I think I will like it there....I am just scared because as you will see later on in my e-mail the people can be a little "too friendly" lol. Monday we went shopping for some basic apartment things and got the U-Haul unloaded in a garage at the apartments because we had to take it back to the U-Haul place. This morning my parents left me at like 4 am. Very sad. I bawled and cried myself back to sleep until I had to check out and then came down to e-mail everyone! lol.

Ok, so here are the weird things about Texas so far. I went to go look at an apartment and saw my first cockroach. I said what the honk is that mammal in the corner?!?!? You know those little pet crabs you can buy that they paint the backs and sell them in little kiosks at the mall as pets? You could do that with these roaches! No joke!! Their antenna's could serve as a satellite and you could probably saddle them up and take them for a ride. I am just hoping I don't get carried away or moved out by them!! Just as long as I whip them before they whip me I think I will be ok! lol Ok another thing as I was saying earlier. The people here can be just a little too friendly! I have always thought of myself as a outgoing and friendly....well my friends you have seen nothing yet! lol The people at the church I went to....everyone who came up and introduced themselves to me after they said my name is so and so what's yours? They asked a MILLION and one and a 1/2 questions!!!!!!! Then some would hug me...and not just a little hug....like a big ol' Texas sized hug! lol Some I didn't mind but then some I was like ok....get off! lol :) The humidity is INSANE I think I have sweated more since I have been here in the last week than I have in my whole life! lol

I am SO scared of the hurricane season, I have been warned and there is a list they give you of supplies to get. The first thing anyone will tell you here is NOT to wait, to just LEAVE! lol So you may be seeing me sooner than expected if I wash up there! lol Traffic and drivers here.... can't even go there or I will cuss and loose my sanctification....they are out of their minds crazy!!!! I take as many side roads as possible! One of the things I love is the hair is big here so I loved that!!! lol I fit right in….in that department!! :) I love that I am 20 mins away from the beach and there is TONS of bodies of water here. I do like that the people are friendly but I just have to get used to it. I am just kind of in culture shock here! lol. Well, there is a 10 min limit on this computer so I am going to get off for now. I am sure I didn't get everyone's e-mails before I left so please forward this and let everyone know to keep in touch with me, and I might not have gotten everyone's e-mail right on here, so let me know. I am sorry for all the typo's and grammatical mistakes, I just wanted to touch base! I love you all and I will write again soon!!

XOXO
Elizabeth